NHL Power Rankings - Week 12: Islanders jump up to 2nd spot, Bruins slide to 17

1. Chicago Blackhawks

Jonathan Toews's earth-toned date-wear game > Jonathan Toews's two-way game.

2. New York Islanders

That Hockey Canada has passed over the Islanders' top forward prospects probably means that Garth Snow is nailing his draft picks. 

3. Pittsburgh Penguins

In the month of December, Marc-Andre Fleury has managed a .954 save percentage, the best in the entire NHL by a wide margin (Sergei Bobrovsky is second at .943).

You'll get your Oscar someday, Leo.

4. Los Angeles Kings

When two black holes collide, they form one supermassive blackhole. 

In hockey, when two puck possession black holes collide - as Jarret Stoll and Dustin Brown have lately on Los Angeles's third line - they continue to suck, but it allows the rest of the team to more or less return to form. 

The more you know!

5. Nashville Predators

Pending unrestricted free agent center Paul Gaustad sold his Nashville home this week. 

Seems like someone has checked out the list of free agent centermen poised to hit the market this July and realized that it's barren. 

6. Tampa Bay Lightning

Though they've been unable to buy a break in the offensive end in recent weeks, the Lightning currently employ four different players on pace to put up 70 points this season. 

7. St. Louis Blues

Sing it with me, my green-haired friends:

Another puck gets behind Brodeur
Tainting your legacy, what's the allure?
Maybe it's advancing age, or perhaps a mental block
Lit up behind a team coached by Ken Hitchcock

That's generally a bad sign ...

"Oompa loompa doopity dee / if you were wise you wouldn't start Marty ..."

8. Anaheim Ducks

Ryan Getzlaf's sarcastic response when he was called for embellishment this week was prettay, prettay good:

9. San Jose Sharks

Among NHL forwards, only Matt Martin has thrown more hits than Sharks forward Tommy Wingels, who is also drawing five times more minor penalties than he's taking at even strength. Impressive.

Wingels, Wingels, Wingels, Wingels, Wingels - yeah! 

(Courtesy: Taste the Music)

10. Montreal Canadiens

Vincent Lecavalier is the most popular buyout on Capgeek.com, meaning he could be a Montreal Canadien as early as next October. 

And an Anaheim Duck by next December.

11. Washington Capitals

Happy holidays from Mitch Korn and the Washington Capitals' coaching staff!

12. Winnipeg Jets

Jets forward Mathieu Perreault is very quietly looking like one of the offseason's best signings:

13. New York Rangers

Rangers fans, eschewing the more obvious "A Fish Called Wanda" nickname, have taken to calling third-pairing defender Kevin Klein "Optimus Klein." 

Optimus will defeat MegaTorts and the Decept-Potvins for good, just you wait and see. 

14. Minnesota Wild

It's often said that you could call the sport of hockey 'goalies,' and the name would be more accurate and descriptive. But what if you're the Wild and don't really have any goaltending?

15. Detroit Red Wings

Red Wings coach Mike Babcock despises weighted coin flips, mini-games, and loser points:

*prayer hands emoji*

16. Florida Panthers

It was an eventful week for the Panthers, who got into a something of a street fight in Pittsburgh, won the longest shootout in NHL history, and had to find an emergency exorcist for Dave Bolland.

17. Boston Bruins

For Christmas, the Bruins are hoping that they find cents on the dollar under the tree. Or failing that, a young blue-chip forward to trade away for it.

Better ask Santa Claude:

18. Vancouver Canucks

What's your favorite Christmas hockey movie?

Has Bieksa really been thaat bad at playing 2-on-1s?

(Courtesy: CBC)

Yikes ...

(Courtesy: GifBay.com)

19. Dallas Stars

The Stars have won five of their last six and appear to be getting back on track. On the other hand, they've still averaged three goals against per game during that stretch, so ...

20. Toronto Maple Leafs

Puck (possession) don't lie. Neither do these fans' signs:

(Courtesy: @KyleW/@JoshuaCooper)

21. Philadelphia Flyers

This week - in a league racked by an outbreak of the mumps virus - Claude Giroux bit an opponent's sweater:

And lord nose he rubbed snot on the back of a referee:

Still, this give-and-go with Jakub Voracek was easily the filthiest thing Giroux did this week:

22. Ottawa Senators

Every family has a black sheep. For Santa's family, the uncle no one wants to sit beside at holiday dinner is Colin Greening's no-trade Claus. And fair enough.

23. Calgary Flames

No one in hockey knows how to extend a head coach in December mere moments before their club's season falls apart quite like Brian Burke does.

In this graph, the green line tells you what has happened to Calgary's playoff odds this month:

(Courtesy: SportsClubStats.com)

Ouch.

24. New Jersey Devils

There's a petition with 196 signatures at change.org seeking to have Devils head coach Pete DeBoer fired. Here's a sample of the comments:

(Courtesy: change.org)

On the other hand, some Devils fans really like DeBoer. 

If the two sides remain at each other's throats, this passionate disagreement could be known as DeBoer war.

25. Colorado Avalanche

Erik Johnson has scored four goals in his last four games, finally justifying the St. Louis Blues' decision to draft him ahead of Jonathan Toews.

26. Columbus Blue Jackets

Blue Jackets defenseman James Wisniewski was apparently asking Santa's elves to build his club some extra slings for Christmas this weekend. 

27. Arizona Coyotes

Even if Andrew Barroway soars in on Falkor the Luck Dragon and completes his purchase of a majority share in the Arizona Coyotes this week, this club's ownership saga seems likely to remain "The NeverEnding Story."

(Courtesy: chicka-chicka-gifs.tumblr.com)

28. Carolina Hurricanes

Anton Khudobin was supposed to make Cam Ward look over his shoulder every now and then. Instead, he's made Ward look like an All-Star-quality puck stopper.

29. Edmonton Oilers

It's a new trend called #Oilersing...

30. Buffalo Sabres

Have you heard? Brian Flynn and Nikita Zadorov, a 19-year-old defenseman, turned the Sabres' season around.