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Man carves life-like statue of Conor McGregor out of single piece of Maple

jim104gmc / Instagram

One man's purpose on earth has been fulfilled.

Instagram user James O'Neal has carved a generously bulged, life-like statue of Conor McGregor out of a single piece of maple. Now he can die in peace.

Conor Mcgregor, in maple

A photo posted by James O'Neal (@jim104gmc) on

Now, you ask yourself, why would a person do this? What's he going to do with the completed statue? Does this man have any family or friends? And finally, again, why would a human being do this?

Here's a speculative response to those questions:

  1. What's it to you, jerk?
  2. Sell the finished product to a wood/penis bulge enthusiast.
  3. He lives a solitary existence in a driftwood castle.
  4. Mind your own business, fella!

- With h/t to FOX Sports

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