Weird week in 🏀: Lizzo's lust, Stevie Wonder sees all, and Dern was right

Every Sunday, theScore highlights the week's lighter moments from around the basketball universe. Here's what caught our eye this week.

Why Wolves great 'til they gotta be great?

Sitting courtside at the Minnesota Timberwolves-Los Angeles Lakers game, rising musical sensation Lizzo may have been less interested in the result than the individual performance of Karl-Anthony Towns, whom the 31-year-old "Truth Hurts" chanteuse clearly wishes she knew more ... intimately.

(Not shown: The assless dress that Lizzo wore to the game. You can search this at your leisure.)

Here's an artist's rendition of KAT and Lizzo going one-on-one, "Love and Basketball"-style:

Finally, a Hollywood film worth rebooting. Ball's in your court, Towns.

Shaq is ... very superstitious

On Thursday's "Inside the NBA," the big fella regaled the gang with a story about the time he bumped into his L.A. neighbor Stevie Wonder. Shaq claimed the notably vision-impaired singer was able to identify Diesel's presence with nary a peep from the Hall of Famer.

There are a few possible explanations for Mr. Wonder's seemingly supernatural vision.

1. Stevie isn't actually blind. (Lionel Richie backs this theory.)
2. He could smell the Icy Hot Patch from the lobby.
3. He noticed the 2-foot drop as he stepped into the elevator.
4. Shaq has uniquely terrible B.O.

JD and the tweet thoughts

On Wednesday, a peculiar new Twitter account, "@DalyJohnathan," whose sole preoccupation appeared to be delivering full-throated defenses of Knicks owner James Dolan, began to garner attention.

According to Awful Announcing's Andrew Bucholtz, some of the retorts from the now-deleted account included:

• "Knicks fans should be thankful for an owner like Dolan."
• "James Dolan has had to overcome a lot in his life and is a solid owner. I am a Knicks fan and am thankful for Dolan."
• "Maybe let James Dolan start making the hires. He seems to know a thing about making money and winning games."
• "James Dolan has zero culpability in the Knick’s disappointing season."

With such a transparent agenda and the initials J.D., many wondered whether the mysterious "Johnathan Daly" could be an alias for Dolan himself. Some went as far as sucking up to the account in hope of scoring free Knicks tickets.

In a post-Bryan Colangelo world, it seems unlikely that anyone could be so transparent with their burner accounts. This looks more like someone trying to make it appear like James Dolan is running a secret Twitter account, rather than the real deal.

But you also can't rule anything out when it comes to Dolan.

The Dern files

We owe Laura Dern an apology.

Last Sunday's edition of "Weird week" featured the actress giving a bewildering red carpet interview, claiming she'd seen Baby Yoda at a basketball game. It all seemed a little unhinged, but if the Phoenix Suns are to be believed, Dern may have been onto something.

Mask off

Indiana Pacers star Victor Oladipo was finally confirmed to be one of the contestants on "The Masked Singer" during Wednesday's episode.

And so ends Oladipo's time as the crooning, booger-colored cotton candy monster "Thingamajig," who finished in fifth place.

Dana Brooke shoots on Enes Kanter

It can be hard to tell where reality ends and the entertainment begins in the world of professional wrestling, but "Smackdown" star Dana Brooke appears to harbor legitimate animosity toward former fling Enes Kanter, the Boston Celtics agitator, one-time WWE 24/7 champion, and star of theScore's pseudo-documentary, "Enes the Menace."

"Let’s play a game: can anyone guess who the BIGGEST LIAR & NARCISSISTS IS!?!?! I hate liars!!!!! Be honest & life is that (much) easier!" Brooke tweeted.

But after initially confirming suspicions that she was referring to Kanter, Brooke deleted her original tweet and starting trumpeting the "fake news" refrain.

One might opine that in the highly contrived world of professional wrestling that all news is in fact "fake news." In any case, we invite Ms. Brooke to write in to "Weird week" and set the record straight.

Come back next week for more oddities, inanities, and obscenities from the wonderful world of basketball.